Making a Comeback

Turns out I’m not such a slummy mummy! I know! those of you who have seen me answer the door in just my pjs and odd socks with a baby slung on my hip may find it hard to believe, but, 9 months of maternity leave and a er…… Break from blogging opened my eyes a little.
Turns out I’m just a perfectionist who takes on too much. 

I’d have felt a fraud if I’d continued blogging in this time, great excuse right! But it’s true. Following nergs birth I actually turned into Martha fikkin stewart!!

Septembers a good time to be born… Oh I’m not talking about the academic school year, although, as a late August baby I know this will be advantageous to him, but actually, it means mummy is work free for the most important milestones…… I’m talking about Halloween, Christmas and Easter. Bonding time with baby is good too

I spent the first few months alternating between boobing baking, cleaning, and box sets. All those buffy and Dawsons creek episodes that had built up over the years, were now within my grasp, and, when more quiet time was needed, I would browse Pinterest for my next project, 

Now I’m back to work…. Or have been since August. I miss those moments. But surprisingly I wonder if I’m happier slummy?! I’m still trying to create the Pinterest image but I think my husband likes me more now. 

I kept an immaculate (and I mean immaculate) home, the children were fed home cooked concoctions and there was time for crafts without neglecting the clean up afterwards. But I was a bit like a broken record…. I’m not sure he could not have coped with anymore conversations on which colour scheme to do this or that occasion…. Also it all seems a bit shallow now, my days marked only by the next event coming up… I feel sure I was turning into my mother in law… Who writes ‘start packing’ on the calendar a week before going on holiday. Coupled with the fact that the spouse spent the first 6 months on the sofa bed while I co slept, demand fed and drank coffee in the king size, I began to see how couples grow apart. 

We hear all the time that you should have your own identity as a couple but being a homemaker turned me into a subservient little wife. I loved it in a way, being needed by my family, everything was done, clothes washed, beds made, toilets frikkin sparkling…. A clear surrounding does improve your mood. But then what? My whole existence and sense of pride, was based upon being needed and doing things for others… Omg!! I’m selfish if I’m saying that’s not enough right?

What about the kids? Surely it was better for them, me not rushing about grabbing a homework book with one hand and the laptop in the other? answering questions on phonics while writing about parenting that I’m not actually doing. I’m not sure, but I’m pretty certain I began living through them, in manner of scary stage parent. The homemade costumes, the non parenting with biscuits… They prob missed the iPad apps and dreaded the lets browse Tesco again for craft supplies… Lets bake another lasagne from scratch when what they really want is fish fingers. Less complicated meals without the expectation of gratitude at the bottom of the plate. My eldest certainly drew the line when I mentioned marching up to the school to retrieve the worn once PE kit…. Just to give me something to wash, no questions about what this is in her pocket….. She can collect as many stones as she likes now because I’ve not turfed out her Parker for at least three months.

What’s funny is no one was anymore grateful than they are now I’m back to my slummy ways. I feel crappy that I can’t do all I did then, but actually I think my other half will chose to tackle the laundry basket over listing to the drone of my voice as I describe in detail again, how I discovered an awesome new stain remover for real nappies. I think he’d rather wear odd socks than hear how I spent the last two days pairing up 3 years worth of uncoupled ones. 

Dont get me wrong, not all SAHM are like this at all!! But I’m obsessive, a perfectionist… Better I be a slightly grumpy one throwing my being into a million projects and incomplete tasks, than a neurotic one throwing herself  into two or three…. Im not sure, I’ll have to ask hubby which ‘me’ he prefers when he comes home… To our messy house, with a 17month old at the breast and no dinner ready… Hey, today I cleared my work email inbox and put the clean but un ironed washing on the stairs go me!!! 

Oh and I had no time to upload images this time so here’s a picture from peppa pig! We have reconnected with the show over the last four months, fab babysitter!!  
 

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11 thoughts on “Making a Comeback

  1. I realised I needed to engage my brain more the day I told my husband AT GREAT LENGTH how I’d figured out a new way to put a duvet cover on that was easier than before!
    Welcome back 🙂

  2. This is hilarious! I am totally the same. Although I absolutely LOVED being on top of everything whilst on maternity. The ironing was done, I never iron now! I followed a weekly cleaning schedule. All wardrobes were sorted and up to date. Blog admin was done. Oh how I miss having my shit together! Also our babes are the same age. Gotta love a cheeky 17 month old! Xx

  3. Great to see you back blogging. Love how you became a perfectionist. I’d like to think I’m one but never can quite see it through lol. I agree peppa pig is one of the best babysitters I know although the paw patrol gang may be a close second lol x

  4. Welcome back. You sound exactly like me, I had 18 months off work and like you I loved doing the crafts, ironing every item of clothing that when through the wash and of course the house was spotless. Now I’m working full time I never stop, my stay at home self would hate the piles of laundry sitting around, the kitchen full of dirty dishes and the fact I cleaned the bathroom with a babywipe the other day- shhh 😉 I think there could be a balance somewhere in the work/ home life but as yet I still haven’t found it, for now Peppa is the best babysitter while I crack on with chores xx

  5. What’s strange is I’m a perfectionist but not in the home. In the home in totally slummy, but in the work place and other ways I’m a perfectionist. Best of both worlds I see it as! Welcome back 🙂 xx

  6. I’m a stay at home mum and I’ve learnt to accept that not everything can be perfect. Which is bloody hard for me as I’m a Virgo and a classic perfectionist. Even though I’m at home all day I barely have time to do the washing up never mind anything else. I’ve got a lot to work on at the moment! What would we do if it wasn’t for Peppa the babysitter!

    Laura x

  7. Pingback: Craft Addict  | Confessions of a 'Slummy Mummy'

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