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Frozen Party

so last year, when on mat leave, I had time to kill. With big girl H turning 9 I knew it was prob the last princess party I would host. (Sob) I went all out planning for the big day. Here are some snaps and ideas if you’re thinking of hosting one for your little Anna or Elsa! 

   
  
    
  

    
    
  

    
    
    
   

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Let them eat cake (providing you don’t burn it)

Confessions of a ‘Slummy Mummy’ is one week old today yay! Thanks to you wonderful lot we have had 500+ hits. I reckon we should celebrate with cake, what do you think? I thought I would share with you all some baking highs and lows of mine in the hope that you will understand why I’m such a pioneer of the shop bought variety.

Never let it be said that I’m lacking in imagination, in fact I have big plans whenever there’s a family celebration on the horizon. As the day rolls closer I somehow convince myself I’m a cake maker extraordinaire. I Google images and ideas, view the odd YouTube tutorial and purchase far more ingredients, decorations and equipment than humanly necessary. In fact, each cake I set out to create inevitably hits the £30+ spending mark, somewhat counterproductive don’t you think?

Especially when I then have visions of others being so overwhelmed by my talents that I’m obliged to open my own bakery in order to cater for their demands. I must confess now however, that no one has ever asked me to bake them a cake and I’m pretty sure I hear a little groan escape my husband each time I mention I’m going on a baking spree (I’m sure he’s thinking about the washing up though….. I’m an artist Darhhhling, I do not wash dishes….. yes, I could put them in the dishwasher but, once again, like always, its full of clean stuff!!)

I may have the er… physique of a baker, I may have the imagination of a baker; I may even have these cool metal icing nozzles and piping bags like a baker. But, I’m afraid to say, I AM NO BAKER……mergy

The idyllic image

What you see here may look idyllic, but like all good bloggers I edited my life slightly,

My cupboards are in fact a mess, every cake has a story and I’d like to share the truth with you…..

fail

This is what my cupboard really looks like!! and while the outcome of the other two pictures seems good (burger cake), id like to point out that this took 3 days, 3 attempts, £40 and tasted like rotten turkey……. shhhhhh don’t tell though

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Muffin Top

I don’t care how so-and-so pop factor lost their baby weight, I don’t ‘like’ that your baby is 7 seconds old and you’re ‘#back into size 8’s woo hoo!’ Nope, My baby is nine months im still in my maternity get up. I’ve not been ‘back in my size 8’s’ since I was 8…….

Wanna feel better about those extra lbs?

Here are 10 ‘Slummy Mummy’ non-diet tips

  1. Bake (or buy) some muffins of your own and feed them to the other half: Growing together is very important in relationships
  2. Feed them also to your friends….. Do you see where I’m going with this one??
  3. Wear bright Florals (that way everyone will remember you as the lady in the silly dress)
  4. Wear black (no one will comment on your weight, you’re clearly grieving)

    Muffin top!!…..actually that looks quite yummy

  5. Tell everyone you’re a slimming world champion…. You used to be 45 stone
  6. Google pictures of women who ARE 45 stone (don’t you feel better now)
  7. Draw funny faces on your belly to entertain the kids ‘It’s the jelly monster’
  8. Throw out the full length mirror: You’ll look so much smaller in a compact from 10 metres away
  9. Wear a step-o-metre: those bad boys pick up every gesture…. One round of ‘if you’re happy and you know it’ and you’ll have run a marathon
  10. Put a picture of you in labour on the fridge: that way every time you reach for a snack you can think ‘I bloody well deserve this’