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It’s the final countdown

So I’ve hit the 27 week mark, hello third trimester! I’m sure my body knew instantly over night that the blooming stage of pregnancy was over. My eyes are worse than normal and once again im writing in ten min slots. I recently found out little one is lying transverse and boy do my hips hurt at the moment. I wouldn’t normally worry, it’s just that my first two nestled snugly into the head down position very early and didn’t turn again from this point onwards, but every pregnancy is different they say so fingers crossed eh?

With the final lap underway we headed to our local boot sale this weekend to pick up a few little bits for baby, We have become booty addicts of the past few months and I’m pretty sure we should start some sort of therapy before it gets out of hand. We have managed to get everything we will need for little one now and, at under £100 for the lot (bar the cot), its easy to see why we would spend our weekends walking past stalls of silk flowers and crystal hedgehogs in search of a bargain or two. We’ve even managed to get the two eldest summer outfits for less than the cost of fuel needed to get to the various venues, providing you can see past the mullets and tat it’s amazing what you can collect.

Feeling pretty darn pleased with ourselves this weekend after adding hats and scratch mits to our collection, we headed home to the sound of Phil Collins in the Cd player (not my choice but the CD got stuck weeks ago…. If I hear ‘against all odds’ one more frikkin time…..). On the way we spotted a sign for a local baby show and felt we could justify a quick look… plus I really needed to pee.

Unfortunately, given the lovely weather, the place was a bit quiet…. My husband also had to point out to the security guy on the door that I had indeed put sun screen on and that my face was red because I had acne…. Ever seen a 6ft 5 bald man in an orange vest cringe?? Think giant satsuma! Serves him right for telling me what I should and shouldn’t put on my face!

I did find a great product at the show though. Cherub Chews! I remember looking for something similar when Roo was a bit younger but talking myself of it because of the price but with products starting from just £6 I couldn’t resist this one.

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Remember when your little one was a newborn? They would nuzzle in for cuddles and nurse snug in your arms? Well fast-forward a few months and you have arms flailing, toes waggling and hair pulling…. In fact recently Roo has taken to poking a tiny mole I have on my shoulder during his limited nursing sessions…. Sometimes he would play with his feet, other times, if I was silly enough to wear earrings, he would play magpie and see how hard he could tug on them before I yelped in pain. Who hasn’t has to wrestle a tiny fist away from grandmas priceless silver necklace when she leans in for a cuddle and is shocked to find herself wondering if she will escape the house alive?

Cherub Chews have been inspired by Mums for Mums & are designed to attract babies attention while nursing & Babywearing.

Cherub Chews was created out of a need for a distraction for an inquisitive little one whilst feeding and babywearing. Necklaces have been tried and tested by ‘Head of quality control’- Oaks, Cherub Chews Owners Son. He gives them a toothy grin and thumbs up!

Each necklace is handmade in Exeter, Devon, with materials sourced as locally as possible. As a small family run business we try to source everything from small business’ and as we continue to grow quality and craftsmanship is always at the forefront of our products.

photo 3I must admit I was quite seduced by some of the brighter products but in the end I settled for The Coconut Button Necklace only because I have trouble co-coordinating my socks in the morning let alone putting together a stylish outfit with matching accessories, I figured this one would go with most of my clothes and also be quite subtle.

Little man loved it and actually sat happily playing and chewing on it for a good half an hour that evening, leaving me to watch nearly a whole episode of ‘Buffy’ while hubby cooked tea. That’s got to make it a winner right? I wonder how the littlest will get along with it? Three months to go…. And yes, I’m counting!!

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The mid-way spot week 21

Woo hoo, I’ve past the halfway point and therefore last week we got to see our little one again. The 20 week scan was pretty awesome, no, not the 45 min wait with a bored 8 year old and an inquisitive toddler, not the constant trips to the loo or even seeing the fish again, but the sonographer was lovely. She explained everything she was looking at and even if I did have to nod and smile a few times because the fuzz on the screen made little sense to me, it was great to know that all is well and our ‘macfly’ is developing away nicely. I have to admit that on one of my many trips to the loo (half way through the scan I add) I did have an overwhelming urge to know the sex of our next arrival. Luckily hubby stayed strong and we are still team yellow.

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Despite raving about how wonderful my skin is looking these days I’m having to write this post in 15 min slots as, I have apparently developed a bad case of eye acne… yep it exists. My face is clear but after weeks of struggling in front of the computer for work, a trip to the A&E eye department confirmed that I have been getting inflamed cysts on my inner eyelids. It’s a condition which affects menopausal women?? And can lead to flaks of skin being dragged across the eye causing infections (like the conjunctivitis I had before) and dry eye. No wonder I’ve been in so much pain! Just to top this off, I have also got some on my ears too which could be the cause of my headaches. Off to the specialist Friday to see what can be done, It may be a case of put up until little one arrives…. And I thought everything was going so well.

The sickness has died down, only once or twice a week now and I’m getting bigger by the day. Baby Roo seems to be over his nursing strike and, although I’m questioning if he’s getting any milk now or just enjoys the comfort of nursing, I’m glad he wants to continue a while longer. We’re having to negotiate the bump now which is tricky, not to mention that if the next one continues as long as him I will have been breastfeeding for 4 years straight…. Geez… 4 years of nursing bras and baggy tops How glamorous! That’s also four years of sitting down to nurse only to discover that both your cupa tea and the tv remote are out of reach and, four years of worrying you’re gonna squirt milk over anyone who happens to be within boob shot of your hungry child…. You’ve been there right? That rush of panic when little one pulls away suddenly mid-feed and your milk lands on your friend’s tuna sandwich. Still, We have two for a reason right?

bfeeding

The name debate continues, we cannot agree on one for either sex and I’m starting to wonder if we will ever find something we both like…. Of course Macfly Macdonald has a ring to it right?? I find myself listening more on the school run as parents call after their offspring in sing song tones, ‘Did you remember your lunch Jasper?’ ‘How was your day Gertrude’ ‘Don’t pick your nose Billy’ you get the idea… It would be nice to have something more unique this time around; I think you get braver the more children you have…. I mean little Gertrude is number 5 in her family…. Suggestions on a postcard!

baby name

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Sucking on coins at week 14

That’s right, I’m 14 weeks preggers and I have no idea when that happened, I’m still not even sure I am pregnant (bar the scan pics but they could be faked right?)

…. I had visions of telling you all about the real side of pregnancy, the un-glossy version you don’t read about in parenting magazines, but this little bean is so different from my previous two ‘monster symptom’ pregnancies that I’d feel like a fraud if I told you I was puking every day. Oh yes I’ve been sick, but with both H and Roo I did the exorcist impression every day for pretty much my entire pregnancy (and into labour last time) this time around I’m doing so much better.

I do have that ghastly metallic taste thing for the first time though, It doesn’t matter how many times I clean my teeth you can pretty much guarantee everything tastes like copper, yuk! I’m drinking lemonade like nobody’s business to try and counteract this, but I’m pretty sure that rotting my insides with fizz is probably counterproductive, I don’t know what else I can do though, two weeks of sucking on a coin!! Given this, it’s surprising the sickness is kept at bay really…lemon

Had a call from the midwife with my blood results and looks like they need to test again this week, I suspect anaemia because it doesn’t matter how much broccoli I munch on I always seem to suffer from this, It’s a little worrying because I’ve been taking iron supplements for months now, but I’m sure all will be well.

I’m determined not to pile on the pounds this time around and I’m very proud to say that, other than family outings, I’ve not driven the car for weeks; you know that your fitness is improving when you can hold convocation with other playground mums without having to wheeze a hello after walking up the hill to the school. Having said this I’m a little miffed to find my clothes getting tighter, not a problem if I wasn’t still in maternity wear from the previous pregnancy though! I’m loving that I don’t feel I need to hide my baby belly although given the looks I’ve had, I think some people suspect I’ve put on weight, or worse, when they look at Roo then my tummy, that I must have more chub left over from 2012 than I really do, All should become clear to them when it rounds out a bit more though… bring on the summer maxi dresses.suck-in-gut1

So apparently baby is the size of a lemon now and I’m starting to look ahead to our scan in 6 weeks, Hubby is refusing to play the name game as he says we settle on one, he gets used to it then I change my mind again… he has a point! Baby Roo was always Baby Roo but we went through a few girl name ideas settling on Viola in the end (I’m so relieved he was boy as I really don’t like that now) and I still find female names harder, H was Beth for quite a while and was going to be Samuel for boy but I do prefer more quirky names now…. Hubby is set on a particular boys name and I think he reckons he can convince me of it but I’m not sure….. Difficult! I guess it’s just ‘Macfly’ for a while longer

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Happy New Year!!!

I hope you all had a lovely Christmas!

What are your plans for New Year? Are you hitting the town or, like me, are you curled up inside in the warm wondering when you last hit the dance floor? I think the last time I stepped into a club was quite possibly my hen party. I sobered up fairly quickly when the DJ was greeted to a huge cheer on asking ‘who here was born in the 90’s’! This was my cue to leave.

I’ve just got over Christmas, the last thing I want to do is go for a night on the tiles, instead, my husband is pouring over his Game of Thrones 4D puzzle at the dining room table (4th day in a row) and I find myself reliving my youth by watching Buffy re-runs: (incidentally it’s the episode where the adults of Sunnydale revert to their youth).

I’ll try and make it to midnight as this will be the time other half and I turn to each other, briefly mumble ‘Happy New Year Love’ then continue our separate thrilling pursuits. Who wants to be on the wrong side of 25 in a night club anyway?

Normally the new year is when I make a Bridget Jones style list of everything I intend to achieve….. It should look like the following although of course, It looked very similar last year

new year 2

• Lose weight
• Always hang the washing out as soon as the cycle has finished and not just refresh the machine every 5 hours
• Sort through all the cupboards which have been filled over Christmas in order to fool guests that I do truly live a neat, minimalist lifestyle
• Donate the Xmas chocolates
• Donate all the skinny clothes in my wardrobe because I’ll never fit into them
• Deal with the charity/boot sale boxes from last year’s (half) sort out, which accompanied us on our move and are now piled high in the bedroom
• Accept I’ll never look at old xmas/birthday/wedding/new baby cards again, bin them, thus freeing up space in 99% of all household drawers
• Make a start on clearing my student debt (boo)
• Decorate my office (cute Cath Kidson style florals)
• Stop using my husband’s office as a laundry room
• Remember to take up any items on the stairs when passing them
• Take painkillers the moment I sense a headache rather than moaning to my husband for 3 hours
• Remember to take the pushchair out of the car the night before if walking to school the next day, thus avoiding the rushed ninja routine with baby on hip at 8:30am
• Take all meat out of the freezer the night before rather than worry all day that it will not defrost in time for dinner
• Spend some time actually improving the house rather than googling design inspirations
• Be assertive with our half job cleaner rather than tipping her an extra pound every week
• Partake in spontaneous creative activities with the children rather than having to mentally prepare myself for the mess a week beforehand
• Take up running
• Update ipod for said running trips
• Buy running shoes
• Decide against running due to initial start-up costs
• Update this blog more….. maybe when I feel guilty about not running

new year

Maybe I’ll update you on the progress of this next year…….. I’m off to set the Big Ben countdown to record now in case I should fall asleep before midnight……. Might go an open some of those yummy Xmas chocolates also…..

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The Shame of a Messy Car

Today, as I procrastinate on the web I find myself thinking of those little jobs that never get done. Sure, I could be working my way through them now, but cleaning the car out won’t enhance my career as a writer will it?

Of course I could do what I’m sure sensible people do and bring the rubbish in after each trip rather than letting the footwell’s fill up with wrappers, books, children’s clothing and various debris: That would be far too simple wouldn’t it? I have instead, a boot full of plastic bags, each one signifies my intention to tidy….. Before I set off on various exciting expeditions to the supermarket or the thrill of the school run, I load up the children into their car seats and add a carrier to the boot: for when I return home I shall bring in the wildlife!! On the very few occasions I have managed to achieve this, the plastic bags sit on the stairs for at least a week before my long suffering husband decides he has had enough of me walking past them and sorts them out himself….. Many a suitable child’s jumper has be worn and discarded in that car, only to be retrieved with such a lapse in time that it nolonger reaches the wrist.

But who cares right? I don’t often have car visitors. The other half has a quick jog round if the in-laws are coming for fear they will see it as another reason why I’ll never be good enough for their son….. If the MIL starts clearing it out then I know I’ve gone too far. Shame on me for allowing life to get in the way of a spotless car eh?. She does have a small point though, if passive aggressively made: It is fairly shameful isn’t it? I mean, I hate that moment just before I step out the car door, where I pray that a red bull can will not clatter out after me or heaven forbid, someone finds out we had drive-through Macdonalds a week ago… oh the shame!

Not too long ago the eldest opened her door, only for a sudden gust of wind to blow 10 sandwich bags across the playground (leftover from our half term trip, should H get travel sickness). Of course I then had a choice, do I run after them thus alerting even more people to the fact that I’m a complete Slummy Mummy, or do I leave them and risk the raised eyebrows of the few Chelsea tractor driving yummies who did see….. I opted for a third option, yes, I made it into a game…. Quick H, chase the bags, catch the bags, oh isn’t this fun….. Since that day the eldest has continued to ask me ‘when can we play the bag catch game again mummy?’….

The upside to all this however, is that as the car gets messier and messier I HAVE to get more organised in the mornings (?). I can now be found leaving the house at a reasonable time in order to avoid having to park at the school: I’m officially a walker now. The shame of being the parent who gets in THAT car is all consuming. I’ve seen more than the odd glance at the dashboard by families walking past, ‘wow mummy look at that’ the children point at the lose change, pair of sunglasses (yes, in the middle of winter) pieces of lego and wetwipes which festoon the ledge….. I can only hope that such families passing have the same walk/drive debate and can empathise…. If not, well…. Maybe they are cleaning out their cars rather than writing about not doing it..….
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Mum Flu

I’ve been a bit MIA of late, I call it mum flu, not to be confused with the male variety of this illness, mum flu is very different. For a start Mum flu is real, it’s the weight of the world feeling which creeps up on you after a week of insomnia, that run down ache which means that you crawl into bed at 8pm leaving the previous night’s washing up on the side and setting you out of whack for a good few days to come. umbra-casa-tissue-box-cover-3Having recovered enough to be up at 5am with a cupa tea I’m able to reflect on how colds and flu affect our household, because you can be sure, we all act very differently.

The man of the house: now I’m very lucky that the man of this household doesn’t suffer from man flu. Instead, his bunged up snoring could keep even the most run down of partners awake, a little shove in the side serves only to irregulate the rhythm….

When the OH has a cold you can be sure it’s a gamble at night, do you leave him to his earth trembling wheezes? or risk awakening the snot ball with a jab in the ribs? My husband is far too polite, which increases my annoyance, a quick poke and request to stop is very often followed by a heartfelt apology, a few blissful seconds of peace then a volcano like explosion of the snores withheld during the altercation…..ill just leave him to it, maybe leave a passive aggressive note on the notice board in the morning…… I can’t possibly send him to the sofa if he is ill…. Can i???? Might have to get a sofa bed for his man room/office, I’ll put that on the to-do-list!Lemsip-Logo

In the day he’s fairly good at getting on with things, now, this may seem ideal to you mummies who’s other halves lay about on the couch demanding Lemsip and sympathy, however, to me, when the hubby is ill and trooping on, that means the cold can’t be that bad.

Inevitably he starts the cycle off meaning not only does he get the blame for giving me the lurgy, he is more than likely two days ahead of me in its development. No matter how I feel, he has been there and done that 48 hours before…. No lolling about for me.

The only thing I can possibly find to fault this annoying man with is, that rather than use one tissue until it disintegrates, which I’m charged with doing, he manages to: a, sneeze once into every tissue in the house leaving me with kitchen roll and b, leave a loo roll on the dash board of both cars, not great if you’re trying to play yummy mummy on the school run that day! This annoying bugger always remembers to put his tissues in the bin though… far too perfect if you ask me!!

Baby Roo: Now this little monster is always bloomin ill, a mouse could sneeze 10 miles away and you can be sure ‘little boy’ will turn into a giant ball of snot by the end of the day. Does he suffer in silence like his daddy?? Oh no! he likes to mix it up a bit, see what other ailment he can add to it, just to get maximum attention. So far this week (and remember its only Tuesday) he has had the cold, appears to have an 8th tooth on the way (ridiculous as he is only 9 months old) DSCF3178and has decided to try his hand at letting go of the sofa when cruising about, that’s not an ailment you say? Nope but tripping on your own feet or head-butting the stair gate is….. therefore my day is spent (remember I’m ill too) changing snotty clothes locating the loo roll from the cars, and allowing the baby to latch on for most of the day. Does this send him into one of those ill, but cute 2 hours naps? Nope he sits on boob, trying to breathe through blocks nostrils, playing with his toes…. The rest of the time is spent feeling very sorry for himself and rubbing is little eyes, demanding to be carried and refusing his cot…. Sensitive, serious little boy!!

Big girl H: What a miracle child, she’s like Bruce Wills in that underrated superhero film, Unbreakable, this little girl never gets ill, she sneezed once but I think she just had a tickle under her nose…. She’s fantastic at playing the big sister/caring nurse maid, inevitably it is her who: retrieves the loo roll, tuts about the disintegrated tissues left in various locations, and sneaks the occasional soother from the packet (she thinks I don’t know). DSCF2757Harriet is a smart girl, far too wise for her own good, she had learnt from who knows where, various phrases to use when the rest of us are ill. These include….. ‘the best thing you can do is let the air get to it’ (we’re talking about a sore throat here) ‘an apple a day, mummy, you don’t eat enough fruit….’, and ‘pull yourself together, it’s not the end of the world’. All these sayings while v v funny, neglect the real issue…. That is to say, you can be 99.9% sure SHE was the one who carried the beastly virus into the house to begin with.

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Muffin Top

I don’t care how so-and-so pop factor lost their baby weight, I don’t ‘like’ that your baby is 7 seconds old and you’re ‘#back into size 8’s woo hoo!’ Nope, My baby is nine months im still in my maternity get up. I’ve not been ‘back in my size 8’s’ since I was 8…….

Wanna feel better about those extra lbs?

Here are 10 ‘Slummy Mummy’ non-diet tips

  1. Bake (or buy) some muffins of your own and feed them to the other half: Growing together is very important in relationships
  2. Feed them also to your friends….. Do you see where I’m going with this one??
  3. Wear bright Florals (that way everyone will remember you as the lady in the silly dress)
  4. Wear black (no one will comment on your weight, you’re clearly grieving)

    Muffin top!!…..actually that looks quite yummy

  5. Tell everyone you’re a slimming world champion…. You used to be 45 stone
  6. Google pictures of women who ARE 45 stone (don’t you feel better now)
  7. Draw funny faces on your belly to entertain the kids ‘It’s the jelly monster’
  8. Throw out the full length mirror: You’ll look so much smaller in a compact from 10 metres away
  9. Wear a step-o-metre: those bad boys pick up every gesture…. One round of ‘if you’re happy and you know it’ and you’ll have run a marathon
  10. Put a picture of you in labour on the fridge: that way every time you reach for a snack you can think ‘I bloody well deserve this’